Jehovah's
My (ex) mother-in-law was such a wonderful lady. Not only was she beautiful on the outside but more importantly on the inside. Before she died, she would forget and tell me this story repeatedly. Each time I laughed like I never heard it before because it's so funny...
When mom was little it was common to give enema's for anything that ails you. Well, one day her family was going to town and my mother-in-law didn't want to go. So she and one of her sister's decided to stay home.
Soon they discovered that their pet duck was 'sick'. They didn't have an *enema* bag so they borrowed one from the neighbors.(hehe) After these 8 & 9 year old girls gave the duck an enema it really was sick.They looked around and saw their old german shepherd dog.. They gently laid him down on the ground. They patted his head, scratched behind the ears, kissed his nose...he was enjoying all this attention until all of a sudden...ouch..He didn't like that. He started growling and barking. He chased the two girls until they climbed a tree.
You can only imagine how things looked when the family returned ...It only got worse...
By this time the Duck was DEAD. The girls were crying and stuck in the tree, the gentle old Dog got his bite back and was running around the tree in circles trying to snap at the girls...the neighbors were at the house trying to retrieve their enema bag back. =)
I'm looking forward to hearing your comments. Please be respectful so I can choose your comment as B/A. Thanks.
Someone told me this was such a funny story and that I should re-phrase and put it in a different category for others to read. So I guess I will try it. Thanks everyone for your hilarious stories. Philia'
Brain Babe, thanks for making my day. You sound so nice and to have a mother-in-law that you can't be close to is sad. My heart goes out to you.
I hope to see you again on yahoo. :)
Answer
Boy do I! My mother-in-law was wonderful. She died in 1993 and I still miss her. Iâm no longer married to her son, but to me sheâs still mom.
Altha was born in 1913 and raised in south Florida in the everglades. Her mother was a prim English woman who married a fun loving alcoholic Irishman. Her dad would love to fish but her mom would make him cook them outside. Altha and her brother would take a boat on the river to school and often never made it to school because there was too much temptation. Sometimes they would stop to harrass a crocodile. (She said the only time it was really dangerous was if they had young) She described tying a rope in a tree above a mama croc and swinging over her kicking her in the head and avoiding her mouth. Once she and her bro were climbing on a train trestle. He stuck his head through the slats, turned his head and saw the train coming, then panicked and couldnât get free. She was above, ran over, stomped his head and dove into the water just in time. If her mother had known.......
There were sad stories too. Her parents felt it was important to marry a daughter off before they âgot in trouble and shamed the familyâ so married her at 15 to her dadâs 45 yr old drinking buddy. She didnât know anything about sex, On the wedding night she was raped. She had a son, then a set of twin girls who died in her arms at 4 months old when mom was 18. She had three more children by this man then left him in her mid 20âs. She hated men so much at that point that she felt sorry for her sons because they would grow up to be men. Altha began studying the Bible with Jehovahâs Witnesses and learned her marriage had not been what Jehovah had planned for man and woman. She loved the truth. She took seriously her commission to preach and included her four children in the full time work while also working ssecularly to support them. This was right before and during WWII, a volatile time for JW's. She had many stories about that time.
Later she met and married Eric. A big beautiful Swede who adored her. They were such a cute couple. Dad called mom his little buttercup (she was about 5â 2â tall, he over 6â) They seldom argued but she told me about a time she was so mad at him that she just HAD to hit him with a cast iron skillet. She had to get on a chair and call him over to do it, though. Foolish man, he came! If she ever raised her voice even a bit, she'd say "now you done heard what I whispered." It was part apology, and part emphasis of what she'd said.
They had three sons. The oldest Eric Jr. went on to be a missionary in Hong Kong, and I married the youngest, Jim. When Jim, our three kids and I moved to northern California the folks came with us. Dad had retired from driving cab in Las Vegas and they couldnât bear to be apart from the kids. Mom would make bacon for my son, Jason who was about 4, so he had the strength to beat grandpa at checkers. In their later years they had a home where they had separate bedrooms (dad snored like a hurricane) Eric Jr. was concerned and talked to mom about wifely duties etc.. She laughed and told him "thanks for your concern, honey, but don't you nevermind" then she came to me and told me that dad still came to visit her room sometimes. I said "mom, that's none of my business!" She said I just wanted you to know we're normal, and sometimes the old rooster still crows. :)
We loved having a dozen years with them living nearby before they died. We canât wait until the resurrection to share happy times with them again. Mom always looked forward to having a chance to raise her little twins. Jehovah is so good to us.
Boy do I! My mother-in-law was wonderful. She died in 1993 and I still miss her. Iâm no longer married to her son, but to me sheâs still mom.
Altha was born in 1913 and raised in south Florida in the everglades. Her mother was a prim English woman who married a fun loving alcoholic Irishman. Her dad would love to fish but her mom would make him cook them outside. Altha and her brother would take a boat on the river to school and often never made it to school because there was too much temptation. Sometimes they would stop to harrass a crocodile. (She said the only time it was really dangerous was if they had young) She described tying a rope in a tree above a mama croc and swinging over her kicking her in the head and avoiding her mouth. Once she and her bro were climbing on a train trestle. He stuck his head through the slats, turned his head and saw the train coming, then panicked and couldnât get free. She was above, ran over, stomped his head and dove into the water just in time. If her mother had known.......
There were sad stories too. Her parents felt it was important to marry a daughter off before they âgot in trouble and shamed the familyâ so married her at 15 to her dadâs 45 yr old drinking buddy. She didnât know anything about sex, On the wedding night she was raped. She had a son, then a set of twin girls who died in her arms at 4 months old when mom was 18. She had three more children by this man then left him in her mid 20âs. She hated men so much at that point that she felt sorry for her sons because they would grow up to be men. Altha began studying the Bible with Jehovahâs Witnesses and learned her marriage had not been what Jehovah had planned for man and woman. She loved the truth. She took seriously her commission to preach and included her four children in the full time work while also working ssecularly to support them. This was right before and during WWII, a volatile time for JW's. She had many stories about that time.
Later she met and married Eric. A big beautiful Swede who adored her. They were such a cute couple. Dad called mom his little buttercup (she was about 5â 2â tall, he over 6â) They seldom argued but she told me about a time she was so mad at him that she just HAD to hit him with a cast iron skillet. She had to get on a chair and call him over to do it, though. Foolish man, he came! If she ever raised her voice even a bit, she'd say "now you done heard what I whispered." It was part apology, and part emphasis of what she'd said.
They had three sons. The oldest Eric Jr. went on to be a missionary in Hong Kong, and I married the youngest, Jim. When Jim, our three kids and I moved to northern California the folks came with us. Dad had retired from driving cab in Las Vegas and they couldnât bear to be apart from the kids. Mom would make bacon for my son, Jason who was about 4, so he had the strength to beat grandpa at checkers. In their later years they had a home where they had separate bedrooms (dad snored like a hurricane) Eric Jr. was concerned and talked to mom about wifely duties etc.. She laughed and told him "thanks for your concern, honey, but don't you nevermind" then she came to me and told me that dad still came to visit her room sometimes. I said "mom, that's none of my business!" She said I just wanted you to know we're normal, and sometimes the old rooster still crows. :)
We loved having a dozen years with them living nearby before they died. We canât wait until the resurrection to share happy times with them again. Mom always looked forward to having a chance to raise her little twins. Jehovah is so good to us.
What is the difference between Fujian White Crane Kung Fu and Wing Chun Kung Fu?
Q.
Answer
White Crane is crane based and Wing Chun is based on the crane and snake. Wing Chun was designed to be learnt quickly by rebels against the Qing empire.
Neither is good? Nonsense! Wing Chun is great for self defense as it was designed for that very purpose (for Ming loyalists against the Qing empire and has been tested in street fights in Hong Kong and Southern China). Wing Chun is designed to finish your attacker/opponent as quickly as possible, any longer than you have failed to properly defend yourself.
No conditioning? Well you have never trained in my kwoon. The wooden dummy is not just for practicing the form and applications, it is for conditioning your arms and legs. Some of my Wing Chun seniors have forearms and legs that are like tree trunks. When they block with their arms and legs, it is like getting hit as well. Oh and most Wing Chun students condition their fists too on bags. Plus you get used to being hit there as well. The forms also do some leg stance conditioning.
I cannot speak for the White Crane as I have no training in it. But it is a Southern Chinese martial art and they are no nonsense martial arts born from the need for self defense and dynastic intrigue.
Lastly, when people say that martial arts like Wing Chun are no good for fighting because they are not combat sports is missing the point. Self defense should last seconds, you need to get out of the situation quickly and get away. Standing and fighting for 5 minute rounds is not self defense but a sporting contest. The longer the fight, the more chance of other factors coming into play like fatigue, the opponents friends coming to help kill you, allowing your opponent to get his bearings and weapons.
Do you think U.S Marines fight insurgents quickly or in a longer time period like a MMA round? Quickly! Because it is life and death. You try to hurt me and I'm gonna gouge your eyes, knifehand your collarbone, punch your throat, palm strike your chin/jaw, elbow your temple, knee your manhood, kick out your knees and stomp ya ankles......which of those moves are allowed in a MMA fight? Martial arts and Combat sports have different aims. And I have seen little conditioning in BJJ or Kickboxing.
Edit: I train in an authentic Wing Chun school that is affliated with the Ving Tsun association in Hong Kong. We do all the hard conditioning and sparring that is traditional. However I do concede that there are now heaps of Wing Chun schools popping up that are horrible McKwoons that teach nothing but chain punching and a low straight kicks. Stay away from them as they are as bad as kid Karate Mcdojos. Thanks Donnie Yen and Bruce Lee! Wannabes have watched their films and now teach a watered down dribble without the conditioning, proper forms and cultural aspects. I have seen 5 such schools open up in my area by a pony tailed wannabe who is a disgrace.
Oh and Wong Shun Leung was not a weak fighter eh! He showed that Wing Chun can beat other styles including Boxing when you train hard and are good. Bruce Lee wasn't that good and his seniors thought so. He was just a good actor who could use elements of MA's for film application. He has some good ideas but that was because he never finished his training. In Karate terms, Bruce Lee was a brown belt in Wing Chun.
White Crane is crane based and Wing Chun is based on the crane and snake. Wing Chun was designed to be learnt quickly by rebels against the Qing empire.
Neither is good? Nonsense! Wing Chun is great for self defense as it was designed for that very purpose (for Ming loyalists against the Qing empire and has been tested in street fights in Hong Kong and Southern China). Wing Chun is designed to finish your attacker/opponent as quickly as possible, any longer than you have failed to properly defend yourself.
No conditioning? Well you have never trained in my kwoon. The wooden dummy is not just for practicing the form and applications, it is for conditioning your arms and legs. Some of my Wing Chun seniors have forearms and legs that are like tree trunks. When they block with their arms and legs, it is like getting hit as well. Oh and most Wing Chun students condition their fists too on bags. Plus you get used to being hit there as well. The forms also do some leg stance conditioning.
I cannot speak for the White Crane as I have no training in it. But it is a Southern Chinese martial art and they are no nonsense martial arts born from the need for self defense and dynastic intrigue.
Lastly, when people say that martial arts like Wing Chun are no good for fighting because they are not combat sports is missing the point. Self defense should last seconds, you need to get out of the situation quickly and get away. Standing and fighting for 5 minute rounds is not self defense but a sporting contest. The longer the fight, the more chance of other factors coming into play like fatigue, the opponents friends coming to help kill you, allowing your opponent to get his bearings and weapons.
Do you think U.S Marines fight insurgents quickly or in a longer time period like a MMA round? Quickly! Because it is life and death. You try to hurt me and I'm gonna gouge your eyes, knifehand your collarbone, punch your throat, palm strike your chin/jaw, elbow your temple, knee your manhood, kick out your knees and stomp ya ankles......which of those moves are allowed in a MMA fight? Martial arts and Combat sports have different aims. And I have seen little conditioning in BJJ or Kickboxing.
Edit: I train in an authentic Wing Chun school that is affliated with the Ving Tsun association in Hong Kong. We do all the hard conditioning and sparring that is traditional. However I do concede that there are now heaps of Wing Chun schools popping up that are horrible McKwoons that teach nothing but chain punching and a low straight kicks. Stay away from them as they are as bad as kid Karate Mcdojos. Thanks Donnie Yen and Bruce Lee! Wannabes have watched their films and now teach a watered down dribble without the conditioning, proper forms and cultural aspects. I have seen 5 such schools open up in my area by a pony tailed wannabe who is a disgrace.
Oh and Wong Shun Leung was not a weak fighter eh! He showed that Wing Chun can beat other styles including Boxing when you train hard and are good. Bruce Lee wasn't that good and his seniors thought so. He was just a good actor who could use elements of MA's for film application. He has some good ideas but that was because he never finished his training. In Karate terms, Bruce Lee was a brown belt in Wing Chun.
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Title Post: Does anyone have any funny mother-in-law stories?
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Author: Yukie
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Rating: 95% based on 9768 ratings. 4,5 user reviews.
Author: Yukie
Thanks For Coming To My Blog
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